My Computer is Killing Me!

It is a sly little devil, that laptop of mine. The damn thing has already cost me one angioplasty (heart surgery) because of it and I'm pretty sure I will need weight loss surgery of some kind soon too. Maybe I could sue Microsoft or Dell and charge that they are in a conspiracy with the health care industry. Maybe Google too. That damn thing keeps me glued to my chair, reading, blogging, but mostly getting fat and out of shape. I need to be out on my bike emjoying the great outdoors! I should be working out instead sitting here being assaulted by this cold-blooded killer. It's a vicious battle, the pounds keep piling on. I need a plan, a way to break free of the spell of this serial killer. Heeeelllllppppppp.......